Marriage Education and Marriage Mediation

Marriage Education may be the very resource that can save not only marriages, but enhance all relationships, thereby providing for productive communities.

Yet Marriage Education is not taught in schools. Nor is it a part of most conversations about weddings or marriage. Without a foundation how are we to build relationships that are strong enough to survive the pressures of everyday living?

Sex education is readily available to high school students. No where in the curriculum are there any details on sustaining a relationship.

Our relationships will affect every aspect of our lives. From the relationship we develop at home to the relationship we develop at work and all throughout adulthood.

What do you do when the most important relationship in your life begins a steady decline? Marriage mediation or family mediation may be one simple solution.

Why?

Marriage Mediation allows both parties to speak freely in a environment that they feel safe to voice their concerns. A mediator can allow for the both parties to be heard without emotional interruptions, severe withdrawal such as walking away, or other everyday occurrences that build barriers to communication. Life has unexpected events that can turn your world upside down. Don't allow your support systems to be broken down by simple communications obstacles. Ideally, Premarital Education would lay the groundwork for best results within a marriage.

In the absence of Premarital Education prior to the commitment, couples and families can consider working with a mediator to help solve problems and create a positive and supportive environment for all involved. School administrators, law enforcement officers, etc. are not mediators and should not be asked to intervene between feuding parents. An impartial mediator would work with both parties in hopes of assisting those involved in meeting half way to an agreement.

A Generation of Litigators

I became very interested in Mediation as a form of conflict resolution after my first encounter with a mediator. A real estate matter went sour and I desired my down payment reimbursed. Due to the burden of caseloads, courts often refer certain cases to mediation. My case was referred and I was contacted via mail by the local mediation agency. Initially, I did not oppose to mediation at all. My only concern was that the respondents would not appear and I would risk loosing a personal day at work, not to mention the cost of transportation. Indeed, the respondents did not agree to mediation for their own reasons and both parties ended up waiting three months to have our case heard before a judge. We then waited approximately five more months to receive a decision from the judge who felt he needed more time to go over the documents in the case to make a clear decision. I walked out of court feeling uncertain but confident that a fair judgement would be one in my favor. There were no facts that persuaded me otherwise.

We live in very litigious times. So often we hear individuals state how they plan to sue, or are involved in a law suit. The idea is thrown around so often. It has become so common. But how many of us (not working in the legal field) are aware of the process; the pros and the cons? I contribute to this blog for those among us who aren't legal savvy.

Litigation for the common citizen should be well thought out. Each party should have detailed documents to support their claim. Unorganized individuals should absolutely work with an attorney for best results. Organized individuals may save a few bucks by representing themselves (pro se) in select cases.

After a case is won there is no guarantee that the debtor will pay. It becomes the obligation of the winning party to initiate a whole new process to collect the debt that a debtor fails to pay. This new process entails soliciting the assistance of the local sheriff. Not without a fee of course. Then there are documents to be filled out. After all debts are recovered, it is the obligation of the winner to provide the court with a document called a Satisfaction of Judgement. This releases the debtor from any actions resulting from delinquencies in paying all debts owed in the case.It may take months for the debtor to pay what is owed. One woman waited five years for a payment in a personal injury case.

Law suits are extremely valuable in setting precedents for areas where injustices are not addressed. Common conflicts may do better to be tackled in a new way. After all, the conflicts most chosen for mediation are those that arise most often. This tells us that these conflicts require an innovative way of tackling. Our older methods are stacking the courts with far too many cases. Mediation as a form of conflict resolution that allows both parties to be heard by each other. Mediation cuts down on the wait time. I just wanted to share my experience with you.

Some details of Civil Judicial Procedure explained

The civil judicial process involves attorney and client. The client can be the plaintiff or the defendant. Fees for retaining a lawyer in New York State average $600-900. The initial fee is simply to agree on using services of your attorney. In other words, your case may and most commonly will require more money. Included in this price are court fees, document preparation, travel, research, and time. Keep in mind that the attorney who agrees to take the case will most likely be responsible for numerous other cases. Due to case loads, this attorney will have limited time to personally call each client and provide most current updates on the details of the case. Work hours for attorneys are often spent doing research, prepping for cases, or in court. Many clients complain that they do not feel well informed about the proceedings of their case. This dilemma is not one that can easily be fixed. Often attorneys can diffuse the problem before it has escalated to the need for court interference. Here's a useful tip: The court system is best used to refute federal, government, or city laws or rules that are deemed unjust.

On the other hand, the difference with mediation is that the disputing parties are fully involved in the process of their case. Not only are they involved in the procedure but they are likewise involved in the decision, and/or solution. There are no long wait periods in between court dates, there is no lost time spent trying to reach attorneys on the phone, and there is no surprise when the judgment is announced. Given the complicated court procedure, there appears to be less to lose when using mediation vs. courts. Which one would you choose for common conflict resolutions?

Why choose mediation vs. court procedure

There is a time and place for everything. But today, just about everything is being taken to courts for a judge to decide the outcome. The problem with this is that a judge does not have the time to meticulously address all cases. Some get thrown out, while others are placed on the court calendar and wait weeks; often times months before they get heard. In many cases the decision is not favored by both parties. Mediation is the alternative. What is mediation? Mediation is a means of resolving a dispute by the parties involved in the dispute. The disputing parties decide for themselves with assistance from a neutral moderator or referee. Mediation enables the members involved to decide the terms of the solution on their own. This results in greater satisfaction of the outcome. In the event that mediation turns out to be unsuccessful in coming to a solution, both parties still have the right to take court action. However, the mediation process is to remain confidential. It can not be used against either party. Mediators are often trained in their respective fields. Each mediator brings their individual skills to the process. Mediation can be used to address basic family disputes, negotiate divorce terms, assist in business negotiations, contract negotiations, resolve business disputes, commercial disputes, and much more. Members of most communities are not fully aware of the fact that mediation is a useful tool available and often free of charge. I created this blog to help bring about greater awareness on mediation as an alternative in negotiations and disputes.

Mediation is a viable form of dealing with conflicts, disputes, and legal matters before they go to the court system. It's a great intervention tool that can save money that would traditionally go towards paying attorneys. It also significantly cuts down on the wait time for decisions.

Try it. We can begin to take the responsibility of solving our problems.